Cyber Dating
Not Just For The Happy Couples At eHarmony
By Ben Hogwood

The Internet can be an intimidating place for a single gay person.

First, there is the stigma that online dating is reserved only for those who can't get a date in the real world. Then, there is a stigma that typing in "gay" or "lesbian" into a search engine will transport your computer to the more sexually graphic reaches of the electronic universe.

The first rule of Internet dating, whether gay or straight, is “Be Careful.”

But these are stigmas to overcome, as the Internet doesn't have to be such a scary place. In fact, with forums to meet people, chat rooms to come out electronically before doing so in the real world and sites that let you read how others came out, the Internet can be an informative place.

While some dating sites, such as eHarmony, do not cater to the LGBT populace, familiar sites such as Match.com, Hotmail and Yahoo do. There are also sites, such as gaysinglesonline.com, that cater specifically to the community.

While the Internet has made it easier to meet people, Ramon Johnson of About.com offers some rules to make sure things go safely. First, take things slowly while chatting with an online stranger and ask many questions before committing to meet. If you see warning signs or have a bad feeling about the person, end the chat. Also, don't disclose any personal information that a stranger could use to take advantage of you, such as your address or place of work.

It's also a good idea to leave a trail - the name of the person you are to meet, the location, any telephone numbers - should something happen on your blind date. And prior to meeting the person, get a photo and be sure to save it in an accessible place on your computer. When you meet, pick a mutually comfortable place to alleviate tension and give you an out should you feel uncomfortable. Meet in a public place with many people in the area and, after the meeting, take a route other than your normal path should the other person attempt to follow you without your consent.

For those in the process of coming to terms with their sexuality, the Internet may be a good place to start; still the rule of thumb is "Be careful." The Internet can offer a false sense of security, so when revealing such information in a blog or on a social networking site, people should be careful it cannot be traced back to them. There are many places online, such as emptyclosets.com, where people can post on forums or talk in chat rooms. There are also a variety of sites to read stories of how others came out or share your own story, such as outpath.com.

The Internet is there. Use wisely.