By MICHAEL SCHENKLER

This is an April story — in two parts.

The first part concerns the Tribune and an April Fools’ tradition that is at least eight years old. Our regular readers by now, should be aware that annually, the weekly edition published on or just prior to April 1st, contains a page 3 with an April 1st dateline — it is of course a news spoof page. The page, upon occasion has caused some mischief in the borough and some headaches around the office. The headaches have caused Trib editor Tamara Hartman to tone down the fun. Beware, next year, we’re gonna “tone it up.”

Well, way back in 1996, we ran one of our most controversial stories — headlined “Disney To Redevelop Fort Totten As Theme Park.” A photo of Disney Chairman Michael Eisner, Mayor Rudy Giuliani, Parks Commissioner Henry Stern, Congressman Gary Ackerman and Mickey Mouse breaking ground for the new Disney Theme Park accompanied the story about the future Fort Disney.

We’re not sure whether it was the announcement of nightly parades down Bell Blvd. or the more than 25 million annual visitors, but some Bayside residents put their homes up for sale.

I clearly remember walking into Hyacinth, then my favorite gift shop, and having Sara, the then-proprietor, flip out on me. She fell for the story, as did quite a number of other Baysiders.

Sorry — seven years later.

That article which appeared March 26, 1996 shared the page with two other stories. One headline, “Beep To Blast Off” with an accompanying photo of Claire Shulman in her NASA space suit in preparation for her outer space ride with her astronaut daughter, Dr. Ellen Baker.

The third story, the one that caused the least stir and we felt was the only believable one, was penned by this writer.

“Queens Inventor Proclaims ‘Silence Is Golden’” was an exclusive look at the latest invention of Queensborough Community College professor of physics, Dr. Irving M. Cutterman who had invented “a machine that creates silence.”

The “sonic absorbing oscillator — a frequency modulator capable of determining the frequency of most sound waves. . . and transmitting a counter-balancing sound wave that absorbs the potential sound,” was my explanation of the technical end of the machine I had created for Dr. I. M. Cutterman.   I had created the good doctor years earlier, for a college fraternity brother looking for a fictitious doctor to use for an excuse to miss an exam.

As long as I needed a doctor for my newest fictitious adventure, I chose to bring Irv back to life.

Well, as I explained in 1996, initial tests were able to silence Madison Square Garden, the American Airlines V.I.P. lounge and the “Koeppel Nissan auto repair shop.”

Commercial applications were being tested for restaurant use, library reading rooms, school classrooms and Long Island Railroad cars.

Cutterman’s findings, my article reported, were to be published in the American Journal of Applied Science. Cutterman was also profiled elsewhere in that issue of the Trib accompanied by a picture of my friend Alan Gershuny — one of Queens County’s premiere political operatives.

Now the article did cause reaction — only not locally.

We received a number of calls — including one from Japanese television and another from a British newspaper — both seeking help in contacting the good professor Cutterman.

Well, by pointing out the April 1st dateline on the page and laughing a little, we were able to put the “sonic absorbing oscillator” in the past — until this April, that is.

The second part of this story, occurred this month while I was surfing the web (and I’m not sure how I wound up there) and came across an article published in the British journal “New Scientist” on March 28, 2002, exactly seven years to the day after our “Silence is Golden” Trib spoof.

The online headline of the “The World’s No.1 Science & Technology Magazine” read: “Silence machine zaps unwanted noise.”

“What?” I thought out loud.

The article explained:

“You will soon be able to silence the deafening racket of a road drill or the thumping beat from a nightclub without blocking the sounds you want to hear, according to Selwyn Wright, an engineer at the University of Huddersfield in Yorkshire, UK.

He has developed what he calls the Silence Machine. It works by analysing the stream of sound waves from a noise source, and generating sound that is exactly out of phase and neutralises the incoming sound waves.

The concept is already in use commercially in noise-cancelling headphones to wear in passenger aircraft. These cancel out the jet engine noise and let you hear the in-flight movie in peace. And flat-panel speakers that produce anti-noise have been fitted to fighter plane cockpits to make them more comfortable for pilots.

But Wright’s system is the first that can block out a particular source of noise to produce a personal “sound shadow” in which everything but the unwanted noise will still be audible.”

Wright’s invention uses microphones for sound sampling and a computer to generate the anti-noise.

Wright explained to the British Scientific journal that, “He expects an industrial-scale Silence Machine to cost around £10,000, while smaller domestic versions will sell at about £1,000. It could be used to create quiet zones in a garden, for example, or around your house, blocking out railway, aircraft and motorway noises, without affecting pleasant sound such as birdsong.”

Now, I wonder, since my article is copyrighted in 1996, and I’m clearly published seven years before Wright, am I entitled to royalties?

Or maybe I should call Disney and start buying up homes near Bell Blvd.

Shhhh! Keep it quiet.

ANOTHER ASIAN ELECTED OFFICIAL? John Liu, rest easy, it’s not happening so quickly.

Meetings have been held by leaders of the Flushing Asian Community to try to come up with an alternative candidate to run in the September Dem Primary in the newly drawn 22nd A.D. The seat, presumably drawn for an Asian, previously belonged largely to labor powerhouse Assemblyman Brian McLaughlin who has opted to run in the 25th — an adjoining district — leaving the 22nd as one of two Queens Assembly seats without an incumbent.

Paul Belliveau, a newly appointed Community Board member with the backing of the politically active and astute painter’s union (the folks that brought you Liz Crowley in the 30th Council District last year) and frequent Chinese candidate Ethel Chen have emerged so far as the first two out of the starting gate. Surprisingly, although there have been whispers, not many hats are flying towards this ring.

Certainly Korean Terence Park, who like Chen, lost to John Liu for Council, must be considered a possibility. We’d expect however to watch Park join the regular Dem organization and be rewarded with a (beginners) State Committee position.

However, still unhappy with Ethel Chen, Chinese leaders have been meeting to find other viable Asian candidates. Professor Lee, owner of the Flushing Sheraton LaGuardia Hotel and brother of Howard Lee, publisher of the Chinese World Journal — the area’s largest Chinese daily — has held meetings with Fred Fu of the Chinese Businessman’s Association, heavyweight political fundraiser Jimmy Meng and others. Although no names have yet emerged, inside whispers have Meng considering a run.

That would place John Liu, everyone’s Asian superstar, in the awkward position of possibly having to back another Asian candidate who could dilute his stardom. Although no one is saying it, Liu would likely be happier shining all by himself as the only star on the Asian horizon.

Meanwhile Julia Harrison, the very multigenarian longtime elected official of the area who was just term limited out of the Council, has been mentioned as a powerful possibility for this seat. Rumors also have Harrison threatening to challenge fellow Democrat but longtime foe Senator Toby Stavisky. However, perceptive pundits say that if Harrison still has energy left for the game, the Assembly race for a vacant seat is certainly easier than taking on incumbent Stavisky and the politically powerful political consulting firm of her son, The Parkside Group. They further speculate that Harrison would rather stay in the City than take the weekly wear and tear of the Albany trek and most likely will hold out one more year and set her sights on John Liu — never her Flushing favorite. If Liu keeps up his present pace, nothing in this world will prevent his easy reelection in 2003. Those who have seen Harrison recently suggest  she will not seek another last hurrah.

This seat is still up for grabs. Either an Asian or a non-Asian could win it and there is still time for a star to emerge. Although, no longer his district, Brian McLaughlin exerts as much influence as any here. Insiders assume that barring any new friendly names in the race, McLaughlin and his renamed William Jefferson Clinton Democratic Club will be with the union candidate Belliveau. Count on John Liu to be with Brian.

However, when a seat is vacant — no incumbent — anything goes.

Stay tuned.

ADVANCING GOTTLIEB: Last week we told you that longtime political operative Jeff Gottlieb (now staffer to Council Finance Chair David Weprin) was exploring a challenge to Democratic incumbent Assemblywoman Nettie Mayersonn. We poked fun, thinking that Gottlieb was just looking for some ink. Well, after chatting with Mayarson and Gottlieb’s new political consultants — The Advance Group — we can tell you the guy is serious — still crazy, but serious.

Apparently, according to sources close to team Gottlieb, he is exploring a run either against State Senator Toby Stavisky or very longtime Assemblywoman Mayersahn. Our sources indicate that the smaller Assembly seat, requiring fewer bucks to be competitive, in a house controlled by the Dems is really Gottlieb’s goal and to that end he has retained the Advance Group.

Now, Gottlieb’s political rabbi since his break with the Hevesi Organization has been longtime district leader and friend of Mayrsohn, Morty Povman. Insiders find it impossible to believe that Morty would, in this case, be there for Jeff. Furthermore, Gottlieb’s present boss, Weprin of the powerful family and club by the same name, would not risk the wrath of fellow Dem leaders by giving Gottlieb any leeway to make this race.

That leaves Gottlieb and the Advance Group out on their own against Nettie Mayorson who has made more friends in politics than most people know — she’s even kept most of them.

When we asked Nettie if she was concerned about a challenge from Gottlieb, it sounded like laughter on the other end of the phone.

Oh, if we get enough questions about the spelling of the Mayerson name, perhaps we’ll share an old favorite story with you; otherwise, just ask Nettie’s husband Ronnie.

POLTICAL BLISS? It seems with each of the two items above, someone is exploring a run against State Senator Toby Stavisky. Granted the complexion of her district will change radically if presently drawn new lines hold, but beating an incumbent, even under those circumstances is an almost impossible task. Couple Toby’s incumbency and tenacity with the Parkside political consulting firm of Bill Driscoll, Harry Giannoulis and her son Evan Stavisky and you have a mighty potent force.

Hey, Jeff and Julia and other wannabes, remember Dan Hevesi is dropping out of the Senate after evaluating a run against Toby. C’mon!

It’s not that we don’t want to see a good race — we love them! It’s just that our friend Evan is scheduled to get married this June and we’d hate to see him and his politically astute bride spend their summer honeymoon running a petition challenge.

Good luck, Evan.

NICK KNACK: Speaking about marriage: At a beautiful ceremony at the Queens Museum this weekend, former Tribune counsel now Federal Judge and dear friend, Nick Garaufis married Trib reader and our new friend Betsy Seidman. These two warm, loving and influential New Yorkers have chosen to make Queens their home. Their commitment to this borough is evident in their choice of the premier art museum for their ceremony and their Bayside house to raise their family. Their commitment to each other was also evident during the elegant and moving Saturday night wedding. We wish Betsy, Nick and family our love and warmest best wishes.

Mazel tov!